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What to Do After Unintentionally Hurting Someone
When we unintentionally hurt someone, we are often not sure how to fix things.
Don’t you hate the feelings that come when you realize you have unintentionally hurt someone? I know I do. I will feel guilt, shame, and desperation to make things right.
Several years ago, I had an encounter with someone I will call Sandra. We were in a 15-minute car ride at the time. Sandra had a bad day at work and was dealing with the recent loss of a loved one. She was so hurt and angry that everything I said triggered her pain. I wanted to express sympathy and support for Sandra’s situation, but when I tried to explain myself, anything I said seemed to make matters worse.
The more I tried to express empathy and sorrow for her loss, the angrier she became. She said things like:
“Shut up. You do not know what you are talking about.”
“You have no idea how I feel.”
“What do you know about loss?” (Apparently, not much).
I finally shut up. Shocked and bewildered, I was not sure what to do next.
Taking the First Steps
So what could I do to resolve the situation? Here are some steps that helped me in this and similar situations.
