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How to Change a Victim Mentality
Having a victim mentality is harmful. Here are some ways we can overcome thinking this way.
“Being impacted by what happened to you isn’t victimhood. It’s human. Making an identity out of it is victimhood.” Seerut Chawla
I admit I did get an ego boost every time I shared my story of woe with others. And what a story it was: emotional neglect, rejection, physical and emotional abuse, and betrayal. I felt satisfaction when other people were genuinely shocked and angry that I went through such awful experiences.
Telling my story seemed to validate my identity as a walking wounded. It justified my staying in a state of anger and emotional pain. Sharing seemed to validate me as a hero who overcame great obstacles temporarily.
However, having a victim mentality is damaging to our emotions and our relationships long term. It can mask itself as righteous indignation.
Overcoming a Victim Mentality
When we realize that we think of ourselves as victims, there are several things we can do to overcome the distorted viewpoints outlined here.
I am stuck in my feelings of hurt and anger
We may feel that there is no hope that our lives will get better. Feelings of helplessness turn into frustration, anxiety, and depression.